tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post2537390428973159350..comments2023-12-05T01:48:14.962-05:00Comments on Married To A "Functioning" Alcoholic: Do's and Don'tsAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12589633523591657778noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-73242192711732751562013-07-08T22:53:22.484-04:002013-07-08T22:53:22.484-04:00First, thank you for sharing your story...I think ...First, thank you for sharing your story...I think for each of us, no one can know what is best for us except us. I do know that in my experience and from that of those I know, it is challenging to be married to a partner who is in the throes of active addiction. The disease is selfish by nature and the main focus and concern of the addict is their drug of choice. For my situation, that explains so much of our other "issues." Al Anon, my program friends and my sponsor have definitely helped me get through what's come my way, and I do think that it has helped me realize what I do and do not want in relationships in general.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12589633523591657778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-71325420381664219492013-07-08T22:45:48.123-04:002013-07-08T22:45:48.123-04:00It's understandable...we're human beings w...It's understandable...we're human beings with emotions, and we love our alcoholic partners. I have a couple posts I'm working on about this that should be up very soon, but in the meantime, just try to focus on anything related to self-care - whether it's reading a book you like, working on a craft, going for a walk, or calling a friend. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12589633523591657778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-31216455426709107852013-07-07T21:53:24.520-04:002013-07-07T21:53:24.520-04:00I am on this blog for the first time and I share s...I am on this blog for the first time and I share so many of your posts. Yes, holidays...always a special time for the alcoholics to ruin yet another precious memorable event. We have been married almost 20 years, we have no children together and my kids are now out of the house. Time has not been my friend...I always thought things would get better...I know better now. I guess my comment/question would be....do I need to go ahead and accept that our marriage is over? He wont admit to having a problem...he continues to do things to sabatoge our marriage...I feel in hopes that I will use that as an excuse for leaving and omitting the alcohol as the cause.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-74476221704355007752013-07-01T01:57:01.227-04:002013-07-01T01:57:01.227-04:00I fall for the don't argue with an alcoholic, ...I fall for the don't argue with an alcoholic, all the time. I get sucked into his nasty comments and I let it get to me. I am getting better at walking away though. What does everyone else do to keep themselves busy when the husband is drunk and mean?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-9629958523245921492013-06-25T20:06:12.768-04:002013-06-25T20:06:12.768-04:00My worst ones:
Don't wallow in self-pity
Don&#...My worst ones:<br />Don't wallow in self-pity<br />Don't be a doormat<br /><br />And today I am especially struggling with the self-pity. It is hard not to be affected when he's being passive aggressive and nasty. But I try to remind myself that I am not to blame, nor am I a horrible or unlovable person just because he's treating me like an enemy due to his own issues.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-83307722948192300652013-06-24T21:56:00.296-04:002013-06-24T21:56:00.296-04:00I just now found your blog while i was in a desper...I just now found your blog while i was in a desperate search for help. My "functional alcoholic" husband and i have been married for 8 years this September cominv up and have 2boys. Im 29 yrs old and hes 9yrs older than me.Be has always had a drinking problem,even before we met,but within the last 3 to 4 yrs (since our first son was born)he seems to have been spending much more time drinking than with us,his family;including the 3days of hangover. Im so glad to have your blog to read and relate to.It was a breath of fresh air! Im not sure who needs mors help,me or him!..? I wish i could express how frustrated i am and fed up with this whole situation.I love him too much to leave him to "fend for himself" with thos illness,but i do hate the fact that our little boys are growing up fast and beginning to notice Poppa's mood swings and buzzed eyelids..i dont know what's best..grow up with a father who drinks excessively and lies aviut stopping,or grow up with a father who onr only sees when hes at his best.?..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-73052593780453280852013-06-17T16:07:03.618-04:002013-06-17T16:07:03.618-04:00Love love love this! I discovered your blog on Fri...Love love love this! I discovered your blog on Friday and have been reading it throughout the weekend. You are so encouraging, and this was just what I needed to remind me that I'm not losing my mind (although I may act in crazy ways). My heart aches for your situation, but I thank you for your honesty. I keep visualizing that little bird "Hope" and smiling.<br />Referring to your old ISMs post, do you have more details about that "Addictive Thinking" book? I would really like to read it. Thanks.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6159073356151966689.post-19295496260330066362013-06-10T23:12:16.526-04:002013-06-10T23:12:16.526-04:00your words really help me. keep writing.your words really help me. keep writing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com